Finding Balanced Motivation
When I was a teenager, summers were made up of time with friends, a part time job, fishing, cruising around in my truck (late 90’s gas prices made this possible) and more. Trombone fit into my life some, but it wasn’t really my focus between June and August. I was having too much fun. Then around the middle of July, after band camp (yes, I went to band camp pretty much every summer) I would realize that we were sometimes days away from marching band, and my chops would hate me for overworking them the next few weeks. All of my recharging from the summer was eaten up with the stress of catching up at the start of the school year. One of the big ways that I would “catch up” would be to shame myself into the practice room.
“You lazy piece of (word redacted), get the horn out of the case!”
“What’s wrong with you? Your dad is right, you don’t appreciate anything!”
“No wonder you can’t make All-State. You don’t deserve it!”
Do these sound familiar?
Guilt can play a HUGE role in motivation. It can be really effective, though not usually positive. I want you to try something. Pick a day and write down the commentary that runs through your head when you feel resistance to doing the work. Now, imagine reading those phrases to someone you care about. How horrible would you feel, saying those things to someone else? How would they feel?
If it’s too awful to say to others, it is too awful to say to yourself.
So how do we find balanced motivation? Don’t we need to kick it into high gear sometimes? What’s wrong with a reality check? If you’re of a certain age (I am 45, and near the end of the Gen X generation) I can hear you now. “Kids need to be able to handle tough words. It’s a tough world.”
I agree! But isn’t life hard enough when things are going well and there is no drama or strife? I think it is. Why would you allow the only person you have total control over to be mean to you?
I think the answer is to sit and examine why the motivation is lacking. What is keeping you from the practice room? Is it a lack of defined goals? No sense of urgency? An unrealistic understanding of how much free time you actually have before the school year? There are many reasons why motivation is lacking. Find yours, create a plan for how to correct it, and you will find yourself in the practice room sooner than later.
Should you practice over the summer? Yes, but keep it in perspective. If you work hard all school year, and the summer is a chance to recharge your battery, then by all means, take that weekend trip. Float down the river, hike the trail, swim in the pool, grill those burgers, or whatever makes you happy.
As always, if you think I can help you, reach out. Sometimes a lesson or consultation is just what you need!